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Written at 2:35 am on Mar. 04, 2004
i dont know what i would do if i lost you. i feel that i would fall apart. I know you dont like me anymore, as a friend or more, but i still love you so much. i cant and would never forget what happened, you are a major part of some of my best memories, and for that i thank you. i dont know what i would do if i lost you. You dont talk to me even though im at your place all the time, i walk in and you say nothing, barely even a glance is givin twords me, and it doesnt hurt too much, but when i think of loosing you forever i instantly start crying, and i never cry. I dont know if i will loose you, i know you partake in dangerous activities and i know that at any moment i could loose anyone, but when i think that i might could loose you, never be able to talk to you again, with the way things are between us, my eyes turn into waterfalls. i dont know how to talk to you, i try but i have nothing to say. I dont think you want to talk to me at all and this hurts so much. You have meant more to me than anyone else in the entire world and i just cant take the thought of ever loosing you. I dont knwo what to do. I dont know how to deal with this. and i cant stop crying because of it